2/28/09

my cousin is nuts

this girl is crazy. that is all.

Part Time Addict

I think I'm becoming obnoxiously obsessed with fashion. It's taken over my life. I can spend hours surfing the internet collecting wish lists on various websites knowing that I can't afford them. Being a college student sucks. I'd rather live a life of shopping, rich men, fun, laughter, free, delicious wine, beaches, fabulous friends.

Woe is me. I like to imagine my body as a willowy waif or toned amazon . But truth be told I'm brown skinned, afro wearing, 5'4, curvy, thick thighs, hips, butt, and a 38C (and a bit of pudge in the stomach but I'm on Kanye's Workout Plan). Woe is defintely me. I recently read "The Debuante Divorcee" and I'm inspired to wear what I dream of wearing. The most outrageous clothing, dresses, hats, jewelry. Think Olsen Twins/London-Paris Street Fashion/Kira Plastina/American Eagle/Punk-Rock/Wet Seal-XXI-Charlotte Russe-H&M. Yea I'm all over the place.

Point blank. I love to shop. And I mourn that I can't wear what I want. Because than I'd have to wear heels all the time. Which wouldn't suck. But I'd truly like to wear flats as often as possible. Would that be achievable? I dearly wish it would be. I am convinced that I will dress like that.

I have even come up with a name. Distressed Chic. I dress in dark colors often. My friends think I'm depressed because I shy away from bright colors. But I don't need to stand out. I already do.

:)

Websites I love to Visit... This List isn't exhaustive:

Romeo, Romeo Where Art Thou?

I'm focused on living and loving my life.

I dream of a happy ending with a fairy tale romance but I'm logical and I want a love that keeps me on my toes. My heart can not be contained.

I live for danger. I love the heady rush of being in love and not knowing where my life will take me. I think in love songs and in prose.

I want to be in love. I want to find the man I'm supposed to marry. Would I marry now? Sure, if he was my soul mate. Have his kids now? Nah. My biological clock isn't ticking yet lol.

I can fall hard for a guy. I put my all into it. I'm quite selective.

So many people ask me what type of guys am I interested in. I typically say it doesn't matter as long as there minutely attractive tallish and has humor. But that's a lie.

In regards to The physical characteristic:
  • Over 5'9
  • Looks sexy in glasses
  • Has broad shoulders
  • Toned arms --I like to be lifted :)
  • Not a messy skin complexion (as far as acne)
  • Skin Color- from the darkest chocolate to the cafe au lait ....
  • Not necessarily a six pack but not a beer belly either
  • Nice hair
  • Nice teeth
  • A huge talent isn't always best for me because it's definitely about the motion of that ocean


Now for the Real qualities: I want a gentleman. I want a hero. I want my other half. He needs to be culturally diverse. He has to be able to teach me. He has to want to learn. He has to believe in love. He has to be funny/witty/sarcastic either will do fine for me. He has to be able to out drink me lol. Realize that I'll learn to cook when it pleases me. Don't stress me for not knowing how to make a gourmet meal. Can you? Know that I can cuss like a sailor when it suits me but I'm really a lady. I like to cuddle. I like to travel. I'm impetuous. I like to dance. I love my friends and sometimes adore my family. I won't ask of you that I'm not willing to do myself. I'm spiritually based -- I believe and love God-- but I'm not within any sort of institution. I can't live in boxes. I'm temperamental. Don't expect me to follow the same patterns from when you first me. He has to know my life is Always Under Construction. I don't ask for much but I'm asking for plenty.

This list isn't exhaustive.

I know this entry is rambling and everywhere. But that's just how I am.

Creative Imaginings: The Story of an Hour- Kate Chopin

Sometimes I feel as if my life is closed and I can't open it. I'm in my Senior year, graduating in August. But I can't open the doors. I feel unfulfilled. I've accomplished much. I have an average gpa and my resume is nice.

As I've been told I look good on paper. But I can't open the doors. I'm not the type to have a pity person and bemoan the horrors that life has done to me. I'm a bit to logical for that. Yet I can't open my life.

Kate Chopin wrote a stellar short story "The Story of an Hour" which is basically about how Mrs. Mallards life was empty, closed, stifling, and she was married to top it off.



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